Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Martial Arts is a Scam

If you're an action movie fan like I am, you've probably seen your fair share of cheesy martial arts films. The hero is a much more proficient fighter than his adversaries, who are always incompetent in some fashion. They might be huge, hulking men that aren't smart or fast enough to defeat the hero. They might be over-confident in their abilities, underestimating the hero, who unexpectedly dispatches them. It's been done thousands of times.



I've seen about a dozen fights in my life and they all have one thing in common: the winner is stronger than the loser. He may not be bigger, necessarily, but he is always much more athletic. The fight is usually a series of uncoordinated punches, it has much more in common with a boxing bout than a martial arts contest. The winner either lands more punches than the loser, hits them in the right spot that knocks them out, or just makes the other guy retreat. I don't care how many years you've learned how to do an armbar, if Mike Tyson gets a good punch on you, you're out.



The story of a hero who's trained under a master of an ancient fighting style defeating a villain despite the odds being stacked against them is just that, a story. Just because your "sensei," "master," "sifu," "guru," or whatever seems like a smart individual, in reality he's just a scammer. See, assuring people that they can beat up anyone in a fight is in reality a very simple confidence scam. If they're a really good scammer, they can even convince you that you can manipulate your "life energy," "chi," or "qi." This takes a quick moment of critical thought to debunk: "if I'm using my life force to create an invisible punch, am I killing myself?"



Yet, thousands of people sign up to learn how to beat people up. These "classes" can cost anywhere from $10 a month to hundreds or even thousands. You want to win every fight you're in? Sign up at the gym and work out every day. Thinking that you can pay a fee and instantly become Bruce Lee is both ridiculous and hilarious. I can understand what's appealing about martial arts, but it's just false promises like any other scam.